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The son of junior high school did not wish to speak with pa Mom on
From;  Author:Stand originally
"The child is brought up to appeared to leave us a bit more farther, did not have a word to be told with us now. " a few days ago, ms. Gong is hit into our newspaper hot line, she says the son went up become depressing after junior high school rise, be in previously elementary school when, come home to always have the thing that does not say, arrive from the teacher classmate, whats are willing to tell, ask he also says to do not have a thing now, like to close oneself in the room. "I also know the child is big, have oneself idea, of our parenthood also do not know how to should be communicated with him, care him to seem to also cannot find cut, what method can be improved? "

After entering junior high school, lack is communicated between children and parent is not individual phenomenon, to how communicate communication with the child vexed parent also is absent a few. So, how to mix child confabulate? Some postulate parent mights as well try to be created. It is the harmonious atmosphere of production talk above all. Often use the capacity of elder, homiletic snout and child talk, emotional space will be larger and larger. Chat with the child, want to create a kind of harmonious atmosphere above all, the friend that oneself become him, say break a jest, atmosphere one happy, the effect has been met much. Next, the parent should be good at seizing conversational moment, often chatter to be just the opposite to what one wished easily, might as well seize a few moment. A few typical event produced beside the child for instance, if the school produced the thing that produces on body of major event, his friend, the parent can take the chance to communicate more with him, the issue that uses oneself of this kind of child to also pay close attention to very much communicates to it, the child listens easily to go in.

On communication, direct way suits the child of disposition extroversion quite, also can carry a story, an idiom, cite an example, talk about the film, novel to wait, arouse the interest that the child talks, come on the theme that take advantage of an opportunity conducts a talk next. The parent should behave nature, the manner is kind, avoid the child to be in defence guard state of mind. "We will talk " , such dialog can make the child thinks sometimes: "Will to me attend class again. " it is when child mood is not quite stable, the parent is not eager to communicating to it, occasionally parent expression must be jumped over more urgently approach not easily the child's heart, at this moment the method of cold treatment is better, can delay a talk temporarily, lie between some of moment to wait for him mood be pacified or it is to be being compared happy when talk again not late also.

Arrived after junior high school, why a lot of children want no longer at every turn discusses with parents, however oneself are done alone, because he has had independent consciousness,basically be, the hope witnesses his value. At that time, parents wants the give advice of freewill and appropriative child, contend for when greenery. Although child age is small still, lack handles the experience of the problem, but below the condition that allows in the condition, still want to provide the platform that shows to child ego as far as possible. A lot of do father and mother, especially mother, always be afraid that the child is done bad, do sth for sb everywhere. Can make the child loses the ability that thinks independently on one hand so, on the other hand, sound to the child moral quality grows also is very adverse.
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