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Do not make excessive demands to the child perfect

来源: 作者:Stand originally 时间:2009-01-04 Tag: 点击:

□ king is carefree

After Du Lu door is elected as American president before long, have a mother that goes interviewing him before the reporter. The reporter says: "Have Harry such son, you are certain very proud. " the ground of maternal approve of of Du Lu door says " be such, nevertheless, I still have a son, he makes me proud likewise. " " which be? " the reporter draws out a pen to prepare particularize. "Oh, he digs person beans outside. " the mother says affectionately.

Read this story, make I have feeling greatly, the mother of Du Lu door is a good mother really. Foster and teaching children is a hardships and happy job, hope children will have a bright future as the parents nowadays, longing for female Cheng Fengdou is perfectly justified, who does not think whose child has prospect? The child has not be born, always hope oneself child is an ideal darling, beautiful, healthy, clever and obedient, the parents after the child is born hopes to study result in the school again outstanding, have a lot of strong point, each respect can stand out, get everybody's reception. Because talent is outstanding with the child with strong body, always obtain more praising easily with consideration.

But, in living now, but truly perfect child is little little, according to not complete count, on the history, arrive from 19 centuries 20 centuries in 200 years, can say to go up truly ' talent " the child has ten very few only. Different child, inherent aptitude is not identical, should say, major child is very of in a popular style, no matter be appearance or intelligence, and the current situation that present a few parents often ignore the child however, disregard the child's feeling, blindly underground is determined to want to rear his child into perfect man surely, give the child each side thereby bring to bear on very great pressure, when the requirement reads, in class achievement wants be among the best of candidates, ability wants a cut above others again, want to become cadre going to work, obtain good name to wait a moment in all sorts of matches even, when enter a higher school takes an exam, must university of middle school of the key on child take an examination ofing, key, be free, arrange class of this study on the child, get on that to learn a class again, play this game, play that game again. But the reason as a result of intelligence and ability, not all child can be modelled by the parent's volition and train a become a useful person, once the child made mistake or behave temporarily bad and when things go contrary to one's wishes, often begin to debase the child, critical child, complain the child is fatheaded ceaselessly, be opposite actually the child, exceeding " pressure " can make they bear hard, produce intense angst disease, if the child is long-term be in condition of this kind of angst to often can be caused a variety of harmful response. Heart of plum of Er of plum of famous psychological doctor ever had said: "If give the child to bring to bear on exceeding pressure, probable meeting causes the child's introversion disposition, body respect also can produce atrophy. " little imagine, the educational way with this kind of try to make sb do sth which he can't do, perfect pursuit its often are just the opposite to what one wished however as a result, because he violated the law of one personal growth, the expectation cost that often is these parents is higher, its disappointed extent is full also bigger and bigger.

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